B TEAM MEMBER : Oak Kelsey

"I hope that all this frivolity of mine isn't tainting this beautiful little thing that you've created. Nobody likes it when a stranger comes over and pukes on the floor." —Oak Kelsey


Dear Sir,
I am writing you in response to the posting's of Mr. Oak Kelsey. Mr. Kelsey, or Oak, as I like to call him, has sent you several letters and photographs. I would like to thank you for the kindness shown toward him, in placing his work on your very fine website.

For years now I have commented to him on the immense size of his talent. And for years he has shunned my admiration saying "it's no big thing, It's not really that good," or trying to point out the quality of the work I have done, which sucks compared to his.

He is a big stupid liar about his lack of talent. The guy has talent pouring out of his ears. I have tried to keep myself in check, not wanting to make him uncomfortable, by praising him in public. So I will take this opportunity to tell you that he is a true artist and deserving of praise by me and recognition by you.

Please continue to post his letters, and other works, and encourage him to send you more. I know he has quite a number of works and writing which are worthy of attention.

Thank you for your time.

Sincerely,
—Mike Lenz, 7/18/00


PS If you find the above too sweet and sticky to read; then consider Oak a total bastard who steals from his friends and is totally unreliable. In fact once I left him in charge of house sitting and the fucker threw a huge party causing thousands in damage to my home. He didn't feed my beloved cat or fish the entire week, one fish died. He once slept with my girlfriend and told me about it. He even got me hooked on drugs, I'm still in and out of rehab.


Take me to Chapter One.

Take me to Chapter Two. Added on 10/30/01

Take me to Chapter Three. Added on 11/08/01



Take me back