Book One
Part One > 10/87 - 5/89



1. Future maybe. I am pitted against a man much bigger than myself in a battle. I recognize him from some movie or something. Anyway, I have to fight him to gain some kind of control or power, and to gain Kelley back. The fighting arena is a tall cylinder, much like a grain elevator, that stands about eight stories tall. Running down the center from top to bottom is a fireman’s pole. Each floor is flat with a large hole in the middle through which the pole runs—there are no stairs or ladders. The whole structure is made out of perforated metal grating... I imagine that this is so spectators can view the fighting from any vantage point. Before the fight begins my opponent does a gut lever (a freestyle bike trick where the rider supports his entire body with his forearms while balancing on the handlebars) down the length of the fireman’s pole. I am scared now... but I know I will somehow win. Maybe by garroting him with a thin string. I walk around the bottom just before the fight shouting his name, “LORD,” very loudly. I have on loose underwear that I keep having to pull up.
10/30/1987, 4:55am. Hermosa Beach, California.



2. I am searching for an ever elusive half-pipe with someone—a well known skater, I think. We search high and low, until finally, after a long trek in the desert, there it is... about 200 feet below us. A sheer cliff between us and it. As if this wasn’t enough, there is a wall of barbed wire and concertina about two feet from the cliff’s face all the way down. We begin the climb down and stop about ten feet later, bleeding.
“Fuck it man, I don’t even skate vertical,” I say and head back up.
Last week (October?)/1987. Hermosa Beach, California.



3. I am in a house—there might be a party going on. A midget has forced me into the house’s basement. He is scary. The basement is cluttered with things and the staircase is open. I wait for him to return. I know he will. He does. He walks down the stairs hideously (he is ugly). He has a straight razor in his hand and is planning on using it. I am scared. I start throwing things at him as he draws nearer. I knock him down and keep throwing things onto him until he is literally smashed.
2/2/1988. Hermosa Beach, California.



4. Jumbled sequence. Something about driving in a car. My Hyundai. With McGoo and Lew. Driving through a Mexican Desert. We rip out the transmission and drive shaft while driving over a cattle guard at high speed. Another car crashes into what remains of my car just after we coast to a stop at a roadside establishment. McGoo and Lew are about to leave without me, but I say, “Wait, wait,” while grabbing my jean jacket and looking through our boxes of things which are piled on a table in the foyer of the roadside establishment. Medical boxes with supplies and such.

Lew and I are at a high-school pool (Olympic) with a class. The pool is frozen over and a couple of kids almost fell through so class was canceled. Lew and I are the last ones to leave so I decide to walk on the ice. I fall in. I sink fast and begin feeling numb. I cannot move my fingers. Helpless. I scream Lew’s name to no avail. Then just when I feel I am going to die, I push away a small iceberg and somehow escape. I gasp, “Jesus.”

Now we are standing in a candy line. I am wet. I am trying to think of what to buy the whole time I’m in line. Waiting... and thinking that maybe I didn’t really want any candy. I reach the front of the line and a black man asks me what I want. I say, “M&Ms. Peanut variety.” He mumbles something... so I say, “Peanut M&Ms,” again. He didn’t understand or didn’t know what they were, so he asked another guy and they both exclaimed, “Oooohhh. Do you want anything else?” I didn’t, but I happened to think of Symphony candy bars so I said it out loud. He said, “Oh yeah, those are good huh?” and threw me one.
2/21/1988. Hermosa Beach, California.



5. I am walking along a high cliff road. A small wall about two feet tall is to my left, the cliff going upwards on the right. The road is asphalt. People are lining the cliff, grinning. The Beastie Boys are being played very loud. Huge waves are busting over the wall occasionally and staggering the line of people (R.L. is in the crowd). A few people are carried over the wall by the waves and swept away. When this happens everyone scrambles about, then regroups to wait for the next assault... grinning. The Beastie Boys blare on and I walk past it all, not affected.

Later on, my walk takes me to a beach (water left, beach right) and it is lined with people that I walk right in front of. A seated couple look over at me and the man points, laughing at my physique. Maddened, I throw a sand ball at him and walk on. No effect.
2/22/1988. Hermosa Beach, California.



6. I am going to snowboard in modern, red, plastic-molded boots that slip into an aerodynamicly molded snowboard. Click, click. I am carving big lines down a snow-covered mountain with semi-good visibility—only the immediate surroundings are visible. I am mostly in control, though I am veering awfully close to the tree line on the right. Suddenly a car (red?) appears on the run. I stop next to it and peer into the driver’s window. Two beautiful girls are inside. Topless. I lean in and lick each exposed breast with a quick stroke of my tongue and jump into the car. The slope is now a paved road and we commence forward. Now we are being chased by a van. The van is filled with frat boys yelling and hooting at the girls I am with. We stop and the van stops. Only one guy gets out and approaches the window on the driver’s side. He pulls out his dick and proceeds to piss into the car. We squeal off and the van follows. We are now in a dirt lot were we do a huge 180 degree turn spewing dirt...
3/18/1989. Redondo Beach, California.



7. An Asian boy finds out about alien creatures living in the walls of his apartment building. His knowledge must have been detrimental to the aliens because they begin to hunt him down in order to kill him. They injure him very badly, though I do not recall how. The boy’s father takes him to the hospital and he survives. The creatures in the wall are huge, vaguely humanoid and can contort their bodies to fit any shape—like the walls. They feel their way around the building until they are where they want to be then they burst through the drywall to get out.
They attempt to kill the boy again after he returns from the hospital. His dad either didn’t know or didn’t believe the aliens hurt his son—he is in the washroom doing laundry when suddenly his son flys past him and into the wall. He says, matter-of-factly, “Oh well, I’ll have to call the hospital again.” Then he turns to witness one of the creatures protruding from the wall holding a gun and murmuring something about the boy. It begins to shoot but misses. It then pulls itself back into the wall. There are two of the creatures, both pale white and covered with a clear fluid. Their facial features are mostly humanoid but very chubby. They talk to each other as they move down the wall. They are weak. One says to the other, “It’s a good thing we’ve been ingesting out own urine or we’d be dead by now.”

Now in a large cavernous room. I am witnessing a pyramid-like structure from odd angles. It had some sort of seat on the top and drawers along the bottom. A girl sits atop it as a “warrior” man is looking through the drawers while talking to her. I hear no conversation.
5/3/1989. Redondo Beach, California.



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